The call came during the middle of a day and included a question I didn’t anticipate hearing.
“Were you really a writer?”
“What kind of writer are you referring to?”
“The kind that writes stuff. Was that you?”
“That’s kind of a broad question. I write stuff every day, mostly emails.”
“Would you ever write a girl letters?”
“I have done it once or twice.”
“Did she like them?”
“She reads them every day and always reads through twice to make sure she didn’t miss anything.”
“Really?”
“I don’t know. I am not really sure what we are talking about.”
“Writing.I heard you know how to do it.”
“I know something about it but I don’t know if it is the kind of thing you need. What are you looking for?”
“Jimmy told me you were a writer in school and that you wrote a book or something like it. Why haven’t I ever seen your book?”
“I did some writing. What is it you need?”
Write Her A Letter
“I got a girl I want to appreciate me in a different way. All she sees is me as a guy that works this job.”
“She might see all sorts of things. That woman probably sees things you don’t know she sees.”
“I want to know if you can help me figure that out. I don’t want to tell her I am interested if she is not going to be interested in me. You know how that goes.”
“This doesn’t sound like my area of expertise. I could tell you a million things about this one girl and I bet if she gave you honest answers she would say I am right. I bet she would tell you I really understand things about her that most people don’t but that doesn’t mean a thing.”
“It sounds like it does.”
“It might and she might really appreciate it, but what it sounds like you are referring to makes me think of mind reading and that is a skill I haven’t mastered.”
“Have you ever told this girl what you know?”
“She knows I know things but that is not what this is about. What is it that you really want?”
“Write her a letter. I want your help. I saw those two emails you helped Jimmy write. I want you to help me collect my thoughts and put it in a way she’ll like.”
“I told you, that is not my gig. Can’t do it. All I can tell you is to have a beginning, a middle and an end.”
“But what if you were writing a girl. What would you say?”
“That is confidential.”
“Is it x-rated?”
“Might be, but if I wanted her to know that is what I was thinking about I would do it.”
“Tell me something, give me an idea.”
“If I was going to go with something I might say she still smells like home or that it makes me think of some castle or secret world.”
“Josh, that is terrible. You sound so old.”
“I have 20 years on you. That will do it and don’t use any of my ideas on someone who doesn’t know you exist.”
“That is really rude. She knows I do.”
“See, I told you this isn’t my gig. You want help on work stuff I can do that, but the romantic world, not my area. Remember I am one of those old guys.”
“One of these days you need to tell me what you wrote and how to find your book.”
“Ok, I’ll add that to the list of things I need to do one of these days.”
