Don’t know if I’d call this a sequel to the prior post but am certain today was much harder than I would have anticipated.
Blame it on the personal and the professional and there you have the blend of circumstances that created a sort of perfect storm.
Not that I can’t shrug it off because I can but I don’t particularly want to. Don’t want to accept less than I deserve in some areas and don’t really feel like talking about it except I suppose some of it is required if I want change.
And I do, but change is hard and uncertainty comes with it during a time where uncertainty is everywhere.
So I throw words upon a page here and there to see if it provides any sort of clarity and that creates its own chaos.
Because if clarity leads to a ‘goal’ with an undefined path but a definite prize there are other challenges that include the gift of fear.
I am ready to walk under a million stars and share my understanding of the universe and learn about others.
Ready to stop choking without proper air and do more, be more, have more–one day.
Can’t say how it all happens or works but I believe in magic and that it can and will.
Got to set up some time off because the evening has proven that my subconscious is more active and more concerned than I thought.
That is a pretty damn good sign that I ought not to ignore.
So a weekend that goes too fast is leaving me in a position in which I’d rather not be but have no choice.
Guess I’ll play the cards I am dealt or throw the whole damn deck in the air–what does it matter anyway.