Not An Ordinary Father’s Day

People say that Father’s Day is this coming Sunday but it won’t be for me.

Or maybe it is more accurate that it will be a different sort of Father’s Day, ya know the kind where you don’t spend any time with your kids.

It is not because of anything they did, but because of me.

Because I moved far away and they haven’t come…yet.

They will, but it will be after Father’s Day and so Sunday I’ll be on my own, most likely unpacking boxes and trying to get settled in the new house.

The house they haven’t seen yet, but the one we’ll all live in.

And though it was my choice to move and done for the best of reasons those rascals are responsible for the move.

Don’t tell them that now because they aren’t ready to hear it, but one day they’ll appreciate my having learned about life because of them.

Gratitude & Attitude

I ended up 1,500 miles from home because the kids helped me learn the importance and value of experiences.

It wasn’t an easy move or something I did frivolously but something I did because I believed it was the best way to help provide them with experiences.

The best way I could help them see more and do more while getting a good education and living in a nice place.

They helped me learn how much fun it is to give and the importance of gratitude and a good attitude.

I know it sounds hokey, but it is true.

I know parents who think differently. Parents who would never subjugate their own happiness for their kids because they figure one day the kids will have jobs and be able to pay for their own stuff.

People who say they’ll give them something now, but that the focus is on mom and dad because they want to do things while they are young.

Well, I can’t understand that point-of-view or understand how these people don’t understand how much fun it is to have experiences with the kids.

And because of my belief in experiences I had to think really hard about what I need and what I want.

Time To Change

The kids don’t appreciate Time To Change the way my generation does and that is cool with me. I get it, people and things change.

The things that are turn to were and you either move along with it or get left behind.

If you look hard at the picture above you can almost see the face of the preteen sitting on my lap. Sometimes I look at the face and wonder what happened to the little girl from the first picture.

That one would curl up in my lap, lay her head on my belly or climb towards my shoulder and go to sleep.

The new girl is quick to ask me for help and or text me a quick a good night and just as quick to let me know that she doesn’t appreciate certain comments on Instagram.

Once I was a king who could do no wrong and now I am just the clown prince.

Thing is, I am good with it.

If the kids couldn’t function without my guidance, if they couldn’t figure out what to do without my influence I would be really concerned.

Sometimes they do something ridiculous or silly and I ask them to explain themselves but I also am grateful for those moments.

Not just because they are teaching moments but because they are proof that something about parenting has gone the right way.

Independence and confidence are of paramount importance.

Still I would be lying if I said that sometimes I miss the days when they were really little and needed me more.

Do What We Must

Sometimes when friends without kids ask about parenting I tell them the two great lessons have been to do what we must and the meaning of true fear.

I don’t know if it is possible to understand the depth of those two things without kids and I’ll never have to worry or wonder about that.

All I have to do is keep being dad and do my best to keep providing those experiences for them. Sometimes that might require doing what we must and being apart for holidays.

But I have no regrets because I did it for them and that is enough of a reason for me.

Look at the little boy holding that baby, whoa, he had hair. 🙂

Disclosure: I have partnered with Life of Dad  and Pampers for this promotion.

 

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By Joshua Wilner

Hi, I am Josh Wilner and I am happy that you have decided to visit my corner of cyberspace. I am a writer/marketer/friend and family man. My professional background includes more than twenty years in working with businesses to help them do a better job of connecting with their existing and prospective customers. More specifically I have worked with companies of all sizes from the Fortune 500 to the new start up to help them build, develop and grow their social media and marketing plans. I love spending time with my family and friends. I enjoy music, reading, writing, playing sports and laughing.

2 comments

  1. I like the line about the king.
    Some days being away from them are clearly harder than others.
    I have the same attitude. Got to as a parent – I think!

    1. TheJackB – Someone complained that this page doesn’t tell you what to expect to find here in this blog so I aim to rectify this with the next line. I am a father who writes about life, parenting, business, politics and fiction. I don’t use an editorial calendar because I don’t map out what I am going to write that far in advance. The primary focus will be on things that relate to children and parenting. But the nifty thing about that is that encompasses a wide range of things. Sometimes I work with companies on their PR/Marketing efforts. If they provide products or services I will disclose it. Here is an incomplete list of companies that I am currently or have recently worked with: Nintendo, Philips Norelco, Subway, Frigidaire and Mattel. Want to know more about me, keep reading. If I wanted to provide a professional description it would looks similar to this: Jack has a Bachelor of Arts degree in journalism from California State University Northridge. He has been writing for print and web publications for more than twenty years, covering a wide range of topics including: business, technology, parenting, politics, education, sports and religion. That is far too serious so I prefer to use something like: The Jack B. is a writer and author of 39 unpublished books and three screenplays. A former athlete and would be superhero he still fights for truth, justice and the American Way. Though he may look like a grown man, don’t fool yourself he is still a boy at heart. When he is not engaged in Walter Mitty like fantasies he is a husband, father and friend and blogs at TheJackB. Hmm…obviously I have since moved from Random Thoughts over to this place, but that is ok. This page is a work in progress which is a good description for me. I’ll probably tweak this on a regular basis so feel free to keep checking back in because you never know what might show up. I am a prolific writer and update frequently so don’t forget to scroll down the page to see what nugget of wisdom you just might have missed. Here is a short selection of posts to get you started. A Father Describes Parenting A Father’s Burden How Sister’s Helped to Train A Father of “Daddy’s Girl” Inside the Blogger’s Studio- A Dream, Er Nightmare The GermoPhobe What I Dream About I am In Love Becoming a Dad Dad’s Most Important Job A Decade of Dad Grandpa Donuts Why Your Post Sucks and Everyone Hates Your Blog A Letter To My Children- Things That Matter A Letter To My Children-2011 Dad Balances Fear Versus Reality Q&A With Daddy Blogger JackB Save The Last Dance For Me- 75 Years of Marriage An Uncertain Certainty Four Generations & A Wedding The Best Thing My Father Ever Said To Me 1 Foolproof Way To Become a Better Writer The Story Of A House- The Final Days He Died A Hero Twenty-Five Links That Will Make You A Better Writer/Blogger Thanks for coming by, I hope you like it. If you want to reach me use the contact form or try talk-to-jacknow-at-gmail-dotcom You can also find more information by clicking About Me and reading my profile there. Also, I encourage you to sign up for my newsletter using the form on the top right hand side of the page.
      Joshua Wilner says:

      So very true.

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