There is a man who looks like my twin who has spent a little time drinking fancy vodka because his stash of good single malt scotch needs to be replenished.
That same man realized yesterday why the name of one of the parents of a hostage sounds familiar because they were supposed to be on the same program together in Israel.
It is not a shocking revelation but it came about because I received word the program I was accepted to but didn’t attend is going to be put on hold.
This isn’t a surprise either as a number of the programs I was involved with during my youth have either shut down or undergone some big changes.
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I haven’t conducted any research but I have reason to believe this isn’t unusual as there have been multiple societal changes that suggest such things are evolving on a wide scale basis.
The news about the program closing down made for some introspection and I thought about multiple things.
There was the youth director who initially suggested there would be financial aid for such a thing and then changed their tune.
Can’t say why he did or didn’t but I have wondered about him as he was admitted to sexual misconduct issues during the ’80s. I am not suggesting any connection between that and myself because there was none.
I haven’t heard any updates about what happened to him since this came out about six years ago but I have wondered what the legal outcome was.
Thought about two of the bars we used to hang out in Jerusalem in 1985 and know that one of them still exists, but am not sure about the other.
Some might suggest it is where the sweet lips of June story came about.
When you are 16 and living 10,000 miles away from your parents and siblings the future seems limitless.
You talk with the friends you have made from around the world and share ideas about making aliyah, what you will do in the army and ideas for future employment.
People ask all sorts of questions about what life is like in the places we come from because there is no internet and some of our reference points come solely from television/movies and or things we have read/heard.
Other kids ask about The Price is Right, the Sunset Strip and whether movie stars are everywhere.
We flew from LAX to JFK and then switched planes. I can’t remember if I saw the Statue of Liberty for the first time on the way in to New York or on the way to Tel Aviv, but I spent a chunk of that flight talking to the girls from New York, Minnesota and Chicago about what life was like in their cities.
By mid summer in Jerusalem I know who lives in Skokie, who lives in Brooklyn and who lives in a place some guy calls Shaky Heights.
There are a bunch of college guys that sometimes materialize in these pubs we’re hanging out in and though many are cool some are less so.
They are competing with us for the attention of the girls on our program and that college thing carries more weight than being a high school student.
So we get creative and sometimes we talk about writing songs and or scripts. Some of the girls play along and some turn their noses up at this.
Hindsight makes it clear that some of those who played along did so because they were nice and some because they were interested in getting to know us better.
Thirty-eight years later the guys and I laugh about how oblivious we were in some ways and how much has or hasn’t changed.
Heard a rumor about one of the guys from college who is supposedly going to be married a fifth time and laugh thinking about the guy who said that if things didn’t work he’d move to Israel or join the marines.
That wasn’t me. I figured that I’d move to Israel and do something with writing. Wasn’t sure if I could be a sportswriter there, but I was doing ok with it back in the states so who knew.
Some of the people who came after me in this post have made multiple comments about who and what they think I am.
Many have been relatively young or so I gauge from their pictures and writing. I have considered if I would have done the same at their age if I were armed with the same ignorance.
It is possible that I might have and not unlikely that I might have carried some of that youthful self righteous anger.
But I want to say that I would have been less aggressive in assumptions and talking about places I had never visited or experienced.
One of the guys who told me they wished they could live on planet idiot or whatever euphemism they used was triggered when I asked “what the hell do you know” and “what accomplishments do you have to show for yourself.”
When you have been married, owned a home, raised children and put several decades of time into working you learn a few things about life.
You learn few things are as black and white as you want them to be. You learn many of your heroes are just people and that some of the great moments happen because of dumb luck and not design.
You recognize most people are doing the best they can and that you have to focus on the world we live in and not the one we wish for.
Doesn’t mean you can’t work to build that one, but you have to start where you are and work towards where you want to be.
And you have to accept life isn’t fair and it never has been. Again, it doesn’t mean you can’t work towards that but you have to start work based upon reality and not fantasy.
Fantasy may be where you drive towards, but you don’t get there without planting some roots into reality so that you can climb the tree.
