Some people read these posts and think they are gaining insight into what I really think and feel about things and I smile.
You have some insight and pieces of a puzzle but you don’t have everything. You have an outline and at best a basic understanding.
If you really want to know what is going on you have to go elsewhere to read more. You have to pick up the phone and spend time in person.
You have to let down your own walls and see if I lower mine.
It is not enough to say maybe we knew each other in a different life.
You have to take the risk in which hearts and heads meet, meld and engage. There is no other way.
Not everyone can do that. Not everyone can go deeper than what lies upon the surface because that’s not where safety lies.
According to all legal definitions I am the father of adult children and if you ask me if I agree I will nod my head in affirmation.
I’ll also say my adult children in some areas are inexperienced and learning about how things operate in the real world.
Sometimes I remind them there is nothing wrong with acknowledging you don’t know things that you haven’t had reason or occasion to deal with yet.
I tell them the best part of not being 25 anymore is I have no problem admitting there are many things I don’t know.
We talked about making sure their mother and I have power-of-attorney and explained the reasons why.
They were fine with it and understand there is no desire to use it. I didn’t tell them the thought of having to use it is painful but I did share a couple of stories I know so there would be context.
“If god forbid you are incapacitated we need to be able to make some decisions and make sure we don’t have to deal with any hassles because you are of legal age. One day you may have someone else in your life who you choose to fill that role, but for now there needs to be someone just in case.”
I hate that phrase “just in case.”
Ok, I don’t hate it, but I dislike it very much when applied to this particular situation.
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I used to be against organ donation for myself. There were several reasons but I don’t feel the same way anymore.
Now I see things differently and figure if I can’t use them anymore and giving mine to someone else can save a life it is probably worth doing.
I am selfish though and wish to keep all mine for myself. I expect those who care about me will support that selfishness and appreciate it.
But if something happens, well maybe I can save someone. And maybe that will lead to their curing cancer, heart disease or world peace.
Yeah, that sounds over the top and kind of ridiculous to me too, but if my organs are being donated that means my life as a thinking, active, sentient being is over.
Why wouldn’t I want to them used for something powerful and life changing for many people, especially since I don’t want to give up using them for another 100 years.
That is assuming it is a good 100 years of health and well being.
I am considering obtaining a new vehicle and playing around with whether I want to move back from an SUV to a sedan.
When I look back at the last 23 years or so I have split my time between those two almost equally. Had a minivan for a good chunk of those years as well, but that was never my primary vehicle.
The two biggest differences now are that I really don’t need to consider purchasing a family vehicle. Don’t need to be concerned about car seats or hauling baby gear or sporting equipment.
Don’t really have to focus on how many can be seated in the car the way I once did.
Now I think about it for work and personal purposes.
When I was a bit younger I had some interest in luxury features because that seemed like it would be nice. Now I think about spending hours in the car in a different way than I did.
I can still do it and often do but lumbar support, heated/cool seats are of more interest than they once were. Now I notice those things in a way that I didn’t.
Don’t have to have every feature, but it is kind of nice and I earned some of those bells and whistles.
So here I am thinking about hybrids and considering whether the sedan or SUV provides more practicality and utility than then other.
It is a different world than it once was.
