Who Matters & Who Doesn’t

The week started with a leaky toilet and plumbing issues, included a hit-and-run involving my daughter and my oldest nephew’s college graduation.

Told my daughter it is ok to be angry but reminded her that we have insurance, the license plate of the student that hit her and the greatest gift–her health.

The rest is irritating but we can work with that.

Went looking for something to listen to and came across the soundtrack to both Guardians of The Galaxy movies and wondered if some of you were aware it is mostly 70s music. The films were entertaining too and some of you who didn’t watch them might be pleasantly surprised.

Thought about some of that because I was surprised by a few thoughts and a few unexpected memories that got me thinking about who matters and who doesn’t. I know more than a little about who some of you are and what makes you tick.

Things that others don’t know are obvious to me because I just get it. That is one of those things that happens between people for reasons that are inexplicable but it doesn’t change the importance of recognizing the knowledge exists.

But I suppose it is easier to live in a cocoon and to ignore some things than to confront them and everyone has a handful of things if not more we do this with.

Life Stories and Lessons

I stumbled across a story on Sixty Minutes that I found fascinating. If you have moment take time to watch
Man unknowingly buys former plantation house where his ancestors were enslaved.

I can’t say I had ancestors who were slaves but some of the things I have recently learned about family that was lost in the Holocaust makes me appreciate some of the comments.

Because there have been holes in the family history that we couldn’t easily fill in. Holes that existed because others didn’t consider us to be human and took action to remove our ability to connect.

But to paraphrase Jurassic Park, life finds a way.

So much of this is about staying with the search and being able to take clues from a variety of different places to piece together a tapestry that tells a story.

There are life stories and lessons there.

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The most recent episode of This Is Us got me thinking about it. There are minor spoilers here so proceed as you wish.

There were three different times in my life I got on a plane not knowing if my father would be dead or alive when I landed.

I worried each time, but the third was the hardest because I knew that he hadn’t responded well to the surgery that he underwent knowing it wasn’t going to save his life, just prolong it…maybe.

The mad dash from Texas to Thousand Oaks was successful for me. But I also got to be the one to tell him to hang on, that his daughter was coming from across the country.

And I got to tell him that he could let go and that I would do my best to fulfill my promise to him to look after everyone.

It wouldn’t be accurate to say the episode triggered me and that I couldn’t handle it because I did. But I have spent parts of the last two days remembering what happened.

Remembering who showed up at the funeral, shiva and who left messages or sent cards. It struck me in part because I tend not to be that way.

With very few exceptions I don’t pay much attention to who does or does not say/acknowledge important moments.  I suppose it makes it very clear to me who matters and who doesn’t matter to me.

Kind of irritating in a way because if you let yourself be vulnerable you can matter to people who might not hold you in the same esteem.

But if you don’t take risks in life you miss out on some of the rewards and a few are of paramount importance. Given I prefer to swing and miss than not swing at all I know where I fall on this.

Been a hell of a week and it is almost over.

By the end of this month my baby will be done with school and the new future will come at a faster clip than it has.

Can’t believe how fast the time flew and how it seems to be speeding up as we go. I guess that writing these things down is a good thing and that it provides a record.

But damn if some things don’t make me ache a bit.

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By Joshua Wilner

Hi, I am Josh Wilner and I am happy that you have decided to visit my corner of cyberspace. I am a writer/marketer/friend and family man. My professional background includes more than twenty years in working with businesses to help them do a better job of connecting with their existing and prospective customers. More specifically I have worked with companies of all sizes from the Fortune 500 to the new start up to help them build, develop and grow their social media and marketing plans. I love spending time with my family and friends. I enjoy music, reading, writing, playing sports and laughing.

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