Those of who need to catch up on reading and aren’t interested in reading my thoughts about CardiB can click here and listen to echoes of the past/future.
And those of you who read things twice and want to know if I really mentioned CardiB can read this and know I listened to about 90 seconds of a song and wondered why people like her.
Shrugged my shoulders and turned on a Trace Adkins song cuz I needed something very different to wipe my ears clean.
It is the only one of his I know and it is mostly because I heard the lyrics once and they stuck with me.
Stuck with me like the guy who told me I shouldn’t care about the gov lifting the mask mandate here because we are going to die any way.
He is right, we are and I have written about it before and thought about it at length.
The question isn’t will we, but when will we die and will we feel like we sucked the marrow off of the bones of life.
That is the goal for me.
It is possible that some of you might be aggravated and feel like I have been pushing hard in some areas.
You catch me in the right mood and I’ll grab you by the head with both hands and say ‘suck it up.’
Not to be rude but to make sure you see the look in my eyes and to recognize I am really fucking serious about some things.
Life is short and time goes by in large chunks and if you want to figure out what you like or want you might have to make the time and take the opportunity you create.
A couple of the guys are on track to retire within five years or less and I am excited for them but cognizant that is not how it is going to play out for me.
Unless things change I have a chunk of time left in the working world and that is not necessarily a bad thing.
I have some ideas about career goals and it is going to take some time to suss them out and see if I can make them happen.
They may hold my attention or they may go a different direction and lead me to make other choices and I am ok with that.
But I am not ok with the idea of turning off my brain and just passing through life for the next however many decades.
That is not just dumb, it is death. It will kill me if I try it.
That is not hyperbole. I have too much fire in the belly to just shut it down. Too many thoughts.
Too many ideas. Too many questions that can’t be answered solely by reading books or surfing the net.
I write about some of them because it helps organize and clarify it all and there is value in that.
Sometimes you need to figure out if those random thoughts have meaning.
I hit the wall with the pandemic and have been dragging a bit. I am short tempered, grouchy and been fighting online in a few places without any regard for whether I cared about the issue.
It is kind of silly, but it has been a release that I have used in addition to writing and exercise.
Getting bored with the online shenanigans and getting really excited about my second shot and the victory lap at the speedway.
The governor is a fool because we are that close to getting this bottled up but I haven’t forgotten that we are still that close.
I’ll keep wearing my mask and be vigilant for a long chunk of time to come but I can feel the change coming.
I can smell it, touch it and taste it.
I have no long term expectations, but I for damn sure know a few things that will happen this year.
Can see it in my head and sometimes that is all we need
Don’t know the answer to “when will you die” but would be very surprised if it is not quite some time away.
Still wonder if I got Covid at that convention in Nashville but more focused on how much stronger I am starting to feel in general.
All this exercise is starting to have an impact and that means something during a time when the little things are as important as the big ones.
