“You guys are so damn mean and nasty. It is the only way you can win.”
“Yeah, it is terrible to use science and fact to support a position. I have always found it to be mean.”
“You think you are smart, but it is a known fact that you guys can’t win without gaming the system.”
I laugh and ask if he considers paying $750 in taxes gaming the system and he tells me again how dishonest I am.
“You’re right, I have to confess. I have faked every orgasm, paid others to take my tests and lied about being a Doctor of Destiny.”
Somewhere someone wants to know why and how I get involved in this kind of narishkeit. All I can tell them is I know they miss me and hearing me talk about drinking a bottle of ketchup before we we would hang out.
If you spend any more than a moment trying to figure out what that means I wonder if you have been affected by four years of dumbing down America and other stuff.
A Mind Dumb, Er Dump
Wrote about 1000 words and deleted almost all of them because the mind dumb, er mind dump here felt too scattered, too fragmented, too naked and too one sided.
Had a meeting about future opportunities and walked away feeling pretty good, but kind of confused because I have to make some hard choices.
Choices that remind me how short the runway is for some things and how these moments will dictate big portions of life.
Not afraid to make them but it feels strange to recognize that at worst I am halfway through my professional life but realistically could be a chunk further along than that.
Yesterday it was decades upon decades of road and now it is not. It is not a bad thing, but it feels kind of strange.
Probably need to talk this out a bit with someone who knows me well but can provide some perspective. Not locked into anything and can absolutely shift, but damn it feels surreal.
****
I like what I wrote the past two days far more than this. Like what I wrote elsewhere better than this. Frustrates me a bit when I feel like when the words flow freely but seem to do so in an ugly and convoluted manner.
Probably won’t try to fight through it tonight, not here, not now. Got other stuff to attend to.
Could be much worse, but it could be better too,
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