They asked me if I could explain what this is about and I told them to get used to disappointment because I had no interest, need nor pressing reason to lower the drawbridge and enter my castle.
“Unfiltered doesn’t mean I share my innermost thoughts with those who don’t deserve admittance. I can’t be bought or bullied into it because you haven’t got anything to negotiate with.”
The comment about negotiation was a red herring designed to let them wonder if maybe there was something and I wasn’t letting on what it might be.
But there isn’t and wasn’t anything there other my interest in making them chase their tail so they wouldn’t annoy me.
“You know, sometimes it is hard to put yourself out there when you aren’t getting anything back.”
I smiled and said I knew all about it.
“What does that mean?”
“It means what it means” and then I walked away but not before they said “you’re going to miss me when I am gone.”
Too bad they hadn’t figured out I had already left.”
He was an older gentlemen by which I mean older than myself, a description that no longer is as broad as it once was.
“Can you describe your approach and philosophy to the following situation listed on the page below?”
Took me about a minute to read it twice and less time to know how I would answer but I intentionally paused and waited to see if he was comfortable with silence.
“Take a chance. Don’t be unnecessarily reckless but don’t let fear of failure prevent you from being the captain of your fate as best you can.”
He nodded his head and asked if others would describe me as such.
“You’d have to define it in terms that are more specific. Those that know me personally are different from professionally and those who knew me at certain ages might be different too.
The wives and old friends will have their opinions and the children, parents and siblings will have another.”
He nodded his head and asked how I would describe myself in relationship to this situation.
“Measured, calculating, daring and willing to dance in the fire.”
“What does it mean to dance in the fire?”
“That is a good question. Have you read all of the books on the shelves behind you?”
When he nodded his head I asked him what he thought about A Man Called Ove and if he had read more than just The Hobbit.
Later on as we finished up he asked if I was always so deft in changing the subject.
“Not deft at all. I am a freight train that occasionally remembers one doesn’t have to lumber.”
“You’re direct and gruff, but I get the feeling you have some charm too.”
I scrunched up my face and asked him not to ruin my reputation and we laughed.”
Later I wondered if it was shared laughter or something different.