Walked away from the computer, pulled up a picture on the phone and spoke, “Woman, I have so many stories but will I share them.”
Paced back and forth across the bedroom I call my office and wondered if the powers that be had flipped the switch on that changes the weather here in Texas.
One day it is temperate and the next it is hot…all day and all night.
It is a good thing I come from the Valley where I grew up cold winters and hot summer days because it makes it easier.
Though if I am honest our weather back home was more consistent with far more days people would refer to as the perfect temperature and few days of bitter cold.
I miss summer perfect summer nights and the beach along with far better Mexican, Chinese and Sushi.
But there are an ample number of things I have come to love about Texas and if I wrote with perfect honesty there are others.
Instead you get these words upon the page and a comment about a tale of broken work laptops.
I could tell you I am tired and ready to build a real refuge and that I am listening to Castles In The Air while shaking my head at the flood of notifications coming across my screen.
Watched a few minutes of a video on the filming of The Lord Of The Rings and am reminded I need to plan a trip to New Zealand.
I had forgotten how majestic it looks and know from friends it is not just cinematography and movie magic.
There is an old work laptop sitting in a box in my closet that I was told to hold onto as a backup but hope I never need to use because it has become a dog.
I suppose it is a better situation than others I know who have been given defective replacements to use while their primary is fixed.
It is a crazy, mixed up time and if I had my way there are things I would make happen. Time would be stopped and I’d take the pause to do a few things and share some adventures.
But I can’t do stop time, can’t even slow it down so I can only do my best to manage the moments.
That means now I have to find a new insurance broker since mine has gone MIA and/or figure out the best insurance for another teenage driver.
Intermixed with it all are the cries, complaints and comments from all who tell me to be more upset about how unfair life is.
Some tell me I am crazy, mixed up and confused others want to know why I refuse to yield and I snort.
Could be because I watched a teenage boy emerge from the long night and wonder if I get to come out too.
Four years of walking through hell will either break you or help you learn how tough you really are.
Wasn’t that long ago I reminded him how he played most of a soccer game with a broken arm and shared my own story of playing through a broken nose and trying to fix my dislocated finger myself/
Truth is when I look upon my forties the majority of it is not filled with warm and fuzzy memories. There were true moments of joy but there was the exact opposite too.
Five More Miles
Put in five more miles during the early evening and read more reminders about how important it is to buckle down and buckle up.
I smell crazy in the air and my antennae are at high alert. My dreams are a vivid mix of things I won’t share because it is my business and things I prefer not come true.
Might be wrong about many things but I am pretty confident I need to focus even more upon getting my physical self closer to where I want it to be.
What is coming is going to take some doing and will require reserves of energy that don’t come as easily as they once did.
But friends and family are going to need me and I them. We are entering the time when pack will become more important and my inclination to lone wolf it will have to be tempered.
Life isn’t fair and we’ll do what is required because there are no other options.
Ask my pal Mr. Emerson.
