The bells I hear ringing, they aren’t church bells and that is ok ‘cuz this Jewish boy isn’t going to church.
Been thinking about how my baby girl is officially permitted and how this action by the state of Texas has aged me because it means she’ll be 16 on her next birthday.
There are boys calling and or Facetiming her and she is running as fast as she can to grow up.
Sometimes she gets irritated with me when I offer advice she thinks is unneeded or unwarranted and sometimes she may be right.
Every now and then I tell her that some things about people never change.
She may see my generation as being old but the men and women are still boys and girls who sometimes forget how old we are and act goofy because we’re still alive and still interested.
A handful of you, if that many have been around for the majority if not the entirety of my 15 years as a blogger.
Ideally you have seen me grow and improve as a writer and are still here for reasons beyond love and or friendship.
You stick around because you enjoy what you read and this isn’t the mercy kiss that sometimes was given to the guy who spent money on a date.
Anyhoo, a couple of people replied to comment left on Facebook and asked if I had done any sort of political writing.
There was a time I did quite a bit of it and it generated a ton of comments and traffic.
Those were the days before Twitter and Facebook in which there was far less noise and fewer choices and the days when my writing wasn’t as sophisticated.
Or so I like to think and believe.
One would hope that what I put out at 50 is superior to 34, 38 and 42 but maybe not.
Certainly there are posts from those days that rank as being among my best work but the nice part about writing is it doesn’t suffer from the same restrictions as physical feats.
I don’t have to be in my physical prime to compete at the highest levels or to have a chance to place.
There is no reason why you or I cannot improve and become better writers and more effective storytellers as we age.
So the root of the question is focused more upon desire and interest. What topics do I want to write about because want is key in unpaid work.
If you don’t want to write or have some passion about what you are writing about there is a good chance you’ll bore the readers.
In concept that is a bad idea and a poor outcome for something you have worked hard upon. If you put effort in you might as well get something out of it.
Put it in, pull it out and hope that your oven baked it evenly or something like that.
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This joint hasn’t had a particular focus in a while and though I am not particularly bothered by it there are moments where it irks me a little.
It reminds me of a conversation I had with someone about work and working out.
They asked if I could see being number one or if I was content with being number 7, 23, or 69.
“I have been number one and I could be again.”
“Why aren’t you now?”
“Probably because I haven’t been motivated to be number one.”
“Doesn’t that bother you?”
“Maybe not as much as it should, but I can change it. All I have to do is make the decision.”
“Oh, you think you can be focused.”
“You have no idea what kind of focus I have when I decide it suits me or am just motivated to be.”
I read Torah every Yom Kippur for 25 years but haven’t read in probably eight or nine.
For the longest time the campers and staff of Camp Ramah associated me with camp because I was there and a part of it in one way or another.
Been a long time since I was a part of that too and though my connections still run deep it is different now.
I didn’t read, go to camp or participate in any of these things to be seen. I did them because I was part of a community and a member of something bigger than myself.
My kids don’t know these experiences the way I do and sometimes I feel very badly about that as it almost feels like a big failure on my part.
But who we are is not solely who our parents want us to be and that goes for them and for me.
There is still time for them to see and experience some of these things and I very much hope they do.
I have told them about the relationships that develop and the life changing moments that come from these things.
Have told them how I am in touch, in tune and hyper sensitive to it all in the best ways. It is not because I am trying to turn back time either.
I know better, but I also know something about intimacy, power and the importance of not ignoring the damn bells.
Where it all leads is a different story and maybe the kind of tale a blogger such as I will tell or share.
Or maybe it will be back to a different focal point because I know everything and I know nothing. That is enough to recognize I am walking the crossroads.
