The famous Fortune Teller known as Madame Pasqualina once told me I would fulfill my destiny when I went east and spent three days in Cleveland.
I said, “Pasqualah, I have been told that I can’t possibly see enough to gain an understanding or appreciation in only three days.”
“Why do you call me Pasqualah?”
“I only say it to people I really care about and those who pretend to know my future.”
She waved her finger in my face, “three days in Cleveland.”
“I gave her a thumbs up and said, “I’ll buy a house there and see what life is really like.”
A Lot Of Fight Left In Me
There was a moment at a road stop 10,000 miles from nowhere and about 1000 more from somewhere in which I wanted to scream at the world.
The particulars and specifics don’t warrant repetition other than to say I felt like it was me against the world.
Didn’t matter whether it was factual or accurate because feelings aren’t rational or logical. I suppose I must have had some kind of look on face because some guy pointed at me and said I looked like someone had kicked my butt.
“Nah, I still have a lot of fight left in me.”
Wasn’t bravado or ego behind those words, just simple truth.
I knew I was in a situation was frustrated because I felt like I was playing a game where I didn’t know the rules.
But I also believed fortune favors the bold and that if I kept doing what I was doing I would figure it out.
If you don’t like that particular version you can swap it for one in which I write and perform an original composition called Fight Song.
Baryshnikov never looked so good in a tights and ballet shoes. I was the very definition of grace or something like that.
Conversations & Convention
There is not a lot I can do about it because much of it is outside of my control and the one thing I know how to do is push ahead.
Except my body doesn’t appreciate it and refuses to believe the lies I tell it about it being 1988 or even 2008.
There is the expected wear and tear that comes with the mileage I have put on it and the recognition that I can’t just change the pads or calipers.
Can’t put a new tranny in or just rebuild the engine with the sort of ease I want, so I have to commit to a different way.
“You’re a different sort of cat, unconventional. I kind of like that.”
I smile and tell him I am glad he likes it, but wouldn’t matter if he didn’t. I am who I am and I do as I do.
It is said as gently as possible because I am not fighting or arguing. Just sharing.
Sharing is good.
A dozen or so years ago in a different life I am sharing thoughts and ideas about hometowns.
We go back and forth about Cleveland and Los Angeles and what is cool about the cities. There is banter and some competitive something or other there, but it is most friendly.
Three days probably isn’t enough time to see or experience either city.
There are too many interesting things and places, too many good experiences to have…especially if you want to share them.
Just Ask Me
People tell me what they think I am thinking or feeling and I shake my head.
They have their ideas and their reasons, but I wonder why they don’t just ask me.
Maybe they don’t care. Maybe it doesn’t matter to them and they prefer to live in their bubble.
I get it, some people like to stay inside their own because it is easier and or safer. But not everyone does and sometimes you meet those who don’t and have the kind of conversation that reminds you there is something bigger and greater out there.
It is not easy, it is scary sometimes but no risk almost always means no reward. Got to hold on to the people you can really communicate with, ya know the people that really understand you and you them.
It Is Time For Dodger Baseball
The Dodgers won today, 14-3.
It made me happy even if it made me miss LA a little bit. But I really miss Vin Scully.
He was special and I am grateful he was a part of my life. There won’t ever be another announcer like him.
I am going to root for my boys, even if Vin is not around to call the games anymore.
We haven’t won the series since ’88, hope springs eternal. You miss every pitch you don’t swing at, so sometimes you just have to take a shot.
Never know what can happen, sometimes you strike out and sometimes lightning strikes. Guess that is what makes life so damn interesting.