My taste in music is broad and varied but I don’t think I’d ever conflate a Barry Manilow song with Shostakovich: Symphony No. 5.
Except today wasn’t like most days, it was Yom Kippur, the Jewish Day Of Atonement.
I spent 25 years reading Torah on Yom Kippur and though it has been a couple since my last time I still think about it.
It meant something to me and sometimes I miss doing it.
It was somewhere around 2 PM and I was distracting myself from my hunger by listening to music and thinking about the past year and the year to come.
Somewhere during the middle of the piece I thought I heard Barry Manilow singing This One’s For You.
It made no sense to me because I knew I wasn’t listening to a mashup and I couldn’t place where the music was coming from.
Not to mention the shock I felt when I realized I knew what song it was. I am not a 70 something year-old Jewish woman, it is not normally what I listen to.
The Symphony We Write
What I will say I appreciate about Manilow is that many of his songs tell a story and I am a sucker for a good story.
But sometimes the reason I go to classical music is I want to write my own story inside my head and the music helps me find, words, rhythm and ideas.
Especially when it is layered and there are multiple sections and instruments weaving a musical tapestry.
It reminds of about how I have dreamed about writing a symphony and having it performed.
I don’t know how to read or write music, but sometimes I think about learning how or at least finding out what it would take to do so.
I like creating with words and I expect I would very much enjoy doing so with music.
It begs the question of whether it is something I’ll only dream about or attempt.
And I suppose it begs the question of how much time is required to learn and or do what is required to create such a thing.
I have been writing for so long now it doesn’t take much effort to call the words from inside my head and command them to dance upon the page.
We can debate about the quality of such work and discuss how much is related to talent and hard work, but this stuff is relatively easy.
Creating music, well I don’t know how hard that is.
The Complexities Of Life
Somewhere towards the end of the day I lay upon my recliner, closed my eyes and focused upon the past year.
It was filled with some of the most challenging moments I have experienced and some of those spilled over into the current year.
Intermixed with this were some very exciting moments that came from hard word and significant effort.
I suppose the confluence of the good and bad is another reminder of the complexities of life and how we can’t control much of what happens, we have to just go with it.
There were moments where I put myself out there and tried to make some things happen and was shot down.
I don’t let those things prevent me from trying again or feeling like I am incapable of overcoming the challenges we all face.
If people were the reason something didn’t happen I figure it is their loss and if it was a project, well I’ll find another approach.
People like to tell you what you should or shouldn’t do.
The thing to remember is much of their advice is based upon what is good for them and not upon what is good for you.
So you need to determine who has your interests at heart and who is only referring to theirs.
There is a satisfaction and reward that comes from overcoming some things and meeting certain objectives that cannot be earned in any other way.
If I ever write that symphony maybe it will be my symphony of life or maybe it will be something different.
Just as long as it tells a story and has layers to it.
Just before I broke my fast I reminded myself to focus on doing more and being better than in the past and of releasing what doesn’t serve me.
Time is short and I am grateful for new beginnings.