Brazen Confessions Of The Almost Middle Aged Man

A man could do worse than listen to Rob Base & DJ E-Z Rock and think about nights long past.

Instead of reminiscing about fraternity life and the first time he heard about the Clintons he could spend time on Facebook engaged in shouting matches about politics.

There is as much benefit in remembering the early nineties, a full head of hair and no responsibilities as there is in trying to navigate the social media madhouse there.

Instead of hoping the contortions performed on the dance floor are to the beat and considered cool we twist words and meaning trying to prove our point.

Have I mentioned I am grateful there were no cameras to record said contortions and that all I have are memories.

Sometimes I think social media would be better if we didn’t have records of what was said.

And sometimes I applaud the utilities of screenshots to help me prove someone is ignorant, dumb and stupid because making them small makes me large.

I am still working on developing a wit as quick, insightful and biting as Groucho but I don’t think I am quite there yet.

Practice makes perfect or at least helps you feel like you are doing something to move you closer to your goals.

One day I am going to look back upon this time and smile because I’ll remember how in amidst the general chaos and confusion of this election cycle I took a big step closer to some goals I set for myself.

If things go 33.3% as well as I hope they will whenever it is I look back upon this moment will find me wearing a pretty big smile.

Still I won’t count the chickens before they are hatched or put the cart before the horse because some things are not yet done.

Don’t know about you, but every time I think about the tortoise and the hare I wonder if the hare ever lived down blowing that race.

Was he able to let go of his mistake and move on or did he have to go into therapy to get help releasing the luggage of dumb things done in the past.

Since it is a fable we’ll never know the answer now will we.

What we do know or at least what I know is that I don’t want to be the freaking hare so you’ll usually find me trying to find the mythical state of balance between the two animals.

Brazen Confessions Of The Almost Middle Aged Man

The funny part of having spent 16 years of parenting is recognizing the finish line is coming sooner than later.

If there are no surprises somewhere during the next 10 years or so the children will no longer be living under my roof and we’ll become empty-nesters.

So I am starting to look more closely at what needs to happen to make it possible for all of us to reach that place and evaluating what it will take to retire.

Granted this isn’t the first time I have explored these things but I am far more serious about it now because it is not something that is so far off I can’t picture or imagine it.

I don’t intend to let it sneak up on me the way the tortoise did to the hare and to find I screwed up.

And that is probably tied into why I am thinking a little bit about my college life and how strange it is to realize how far down the road those days were.

The strangest part is admitting that my baby is closer in age to college students than I am.

I don’t mind getting older but damn, there is something surreal in looking around and seeing that some of my friends already have kids in college.

Hell, a few of them are already grandparents.

Don’t know why but I can hear Tchaikovsky’s 1812 overture playing in my head.

Maybe it is because it reminds me of life, because there are quiet moments intermixed with crazy and chaotic.

And that is exactly what life has been life for me…lately.