You Must Bore Your Readers

The last time I lived in Texas I didn’t have my own washer and dryer so I had to commute from my apartment to the community laundromat in our complex.

It took all of one load for me to realize I wasn’t interested in having to do that for very long.

So I looked into what it would cost to rent a washer and dryer and figured out I wasn’t interested in paying $40 bucks or more each month to have the privilege of doing my underwear in my own apartment.

As a compromise I spent a few bucks at Costco and purchased 198 pairs of underwear and a bunch of t-shirts figuring if I had to do laundry somewhere else I might as well try to manage the frequency with which I had to do it.

And yes, there were a few times I went commando but having never been a big fan I didn’t do it often.

You Must Bore Your Readers

Some of you know a short while ago I opened up a new blog at Medium because I thought it would be useful to see how that platform works and to see if I could use it to increase the amount of traffic here.

It started out slowly but after a while I started to gain some traction and noticed that I was getting attention on both spots.

Made me feel good and I started to think that maybe, just maybe I had added a new trick to my repertoire and then things took a turn.

Don’t know what happened, but the Medium blog stopped getting attention and this one started going like gangbusters.

The increase here was simple, a couple of places linked to The Digital Graveyard post and boatloads of readers started flowing through here.

Can’t tell you what happened to the Medium blog, other than someone said to me, “you must bore your readers to which I replied, “Your mother is a whore and your father is a drunk.”

Sorry mom, you told me not to lie and I only repeated what I had heard elsewhere.

Or was it, “If you don’t have anything nice to say than don’t say anything.”

Scratch the sorry part, you dropped me in a trash can and dad dropped me in the street.

Those are both true stories, ask my sisters and if they can stop laughing they’ll tell you about how their favorite brother is crazy because I was dropped on my head.

Too bad I didn’t gain any mutant powers from that, just a silly excuse for doing silly things that I only pull out if I think I can get away with it.

Someone tell the guy in the corner to stop snickering about pulling out things only if you can get away with it.

I don’t do that kind of thing and if I did it would only be in the parking lot of fine dining establishments.

Anyhoo…

My friend Danny wrote a post about the importance of putting our phones down so that we can experience life that is worth a read.

Not just because someone commented about my comment but because I am tired of people bumping into me in stores and parking lots because they are too busy trying to respond to a text or send out a clever tweet.

At least half of you aren’t funny enough to come up with anything clever so you might as well stop straining your brain.

The other half of you deserve to walk into a pole or into a puddle of mud and to have that moment immortalized on YouTube.

Maybe you’ll really be lucky and you’ll be known as the star of the viral video of the guy sliding on ice in Cleveland.

Excuse me while I apologize to my mom again for being a bit twisted because she dropped me on my head when I was a baby.

Love you mommy. 🙂

*****

It is not all silly snark and tongue-in-tweet talk here.

I push my children to put down their phones and be a part of the world. I actively encourage them to see what is out there for more than just convenient sources of WiFi.

That is something I wonder and worry about.

I am a fan of people watching.

If you spend enough time with me you’ll see me sitting in the corner of a coffee shop watching how people interact and engage with others.

Can’t tell you how many times I watch people walk in with their eyes upon their phone, only lifting them long enough to tell the barista what they want to drink so that they can return to their electronic cocoon.

Can’t tell you how many times I have heard people complain about receiving telephone calls on their phone and how some of them consider it to be rude.

Enough for me to wonder if people are losing social skills and enough to hope I am mistaken.

I didn’t buy 983 pairs of underwear so that I could avoid having to deal with people at the apartment laundry complex.

I did it because I hate doing laundry.

Don’t know if this is the kind of content that bores the readers or if it is the kind the motivates and moves them, but I’ll keep trying to find that magic mix because I am not the kind of guy who just gives up.

See you in the comments.