Three Questions To Ask Parents & People


My children graduated from their respective schools three weeks ago and as part of my role as proud father I joined the mad scramble to gain the perfect position to take a picture.

Some might say that after almost fifteen years as a father I have gotten pretty good at getting the shot because you rarely see me pushing and shoving the way so many others do to obtain that perfect position.

It is not because I am strong enough to move the men and the women out of my way or tall enough to see over all of them.

Nor is it because I prefer to make snarky comments about the people who think the best shots come from using their tablets and not a real camera or even the  camera on their phones.

No, it is because I know that I don’t need 1,983,832 photos of every event my children participate in.

Question #1

Will you ever look at those pictures or watch the 98 minutes of graduation/soccer/recital you just recorded?

I understand the desire to record the lives of our children and the hope to capture the really important stuff because I think about it and want to do it too.

But sometimes the need to see it live overrides the need to watch it live through a tiny view hole.

It also makes me wonder how many people still develop their shots.

In the old days we’d shoot a role of 24 or 26 on our cool 35 mm cameras and hope that we didn’t blow too many shots.

Heck, the first camera I had was a hand me down that used 126 cartridges, I was really excited when I got my first 35 because I felt like I had cutting edge technology, not like the 110 I sometimes had to use.

*****

Sometimes my kids ask me why there isn’t more footage of me when I was younger or why we don’t have more photos/movies of grandparents and great-grandparents.

That always leads to a conversation about how advanced technology is now compared to what it was once upon a time.

But it always leads me back to the my own questions about what do we do with all the footage we have now and whether we take it because we intend to use it or because we think we should.

Question #2

There is an on going discussion about the importance of asking readers to follow and or subscribe to our blogs and the various social media platforms we are on.

A while back I asked Why Do We Ask People To Subscribe To Our Blogs?

It led to a good discussion here and elsewhere online and I realized that while I am a very good marketer for the companies and clients I have worked for I am not as good about doing it here.

Sometimes I wonder what would happen if I really started to focus on it and tried to build the subscriber base. I could insert forms into posts and actively ask you to sign up.

Enter your email address:

Is that better than a popup, flashing lights, bells and or whistles?

Am I going to discover that by creating a bigger base I have more blogging cachet than I do now. Will that lead to requests for speaking engagements, more reviews, brand ambassadorships, book deals and a starring role in a major  motion picture.

Confession: Some of the trappings associated with fame might be fun but I don’t want to turn my life into tabloid fodder and not be able to go out in public like a normal person.

Second confession: I have significant doubt that any one has any desire to make me the hero in a movie. In fact the real reason I like the idea is in my fantasy world it would mean someone would pay for me to have a personal chef and trainer.

Getting paid to get back and stay in shape might be kind of cool.

Question #3

If you were to give someone advice on what sort of career they should enter would you tell them to find something they love to do or push them to go after something practical?

For example, if your son/daughter wanted to be an actor and you knew it was their passion would you tell them to chase it for the one in the a million chance they could make a real go of it or would you push them towards a career that you knew was likely to help them pay their bills.

I think about this often and sometimes wonder if my children would be better served to be pushed towards getting jobs in tech or becoming physical therapists.

People are living longer so there is a definite need for healthcare specialists. There is a need for people to help take care of the wounded vets who have returned home and as mentioned before there are opportunities in tech.

Not to mention you can’t outsource plumbers, mechanics and electricians.

****

Ok, that is more than three questions but plenty of fodder for thought and conversation. Let’s talk in the comments.

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By Joshua Wilner

Hi, I am Josh Wilner and I am happy that you have decided to visit my corner of cyberspace. I am a writer/marketer/friend and family man. My professional background includes more than twenty years in working with businesses to help them do a better job of connecting with their existing and prospective customers. More specifically I have worked with companies of all sizes from the Fortune 500 to the new start up to help them build, develop and grow their social media and marketing plans. I love spending time with my family and friends. I enjoy music, reading, writing, playing sports and laughing.

6 comments

  1. I remember when my son was born. We seemed to take endless photos and videos of him. The same when my daughter was born. Now I tend to take them much less often because I never end up looking at them. Maybe one day in the future I may regret that?

    It was my daughter’s sports day at school last week and I didn’t get the camera out at all. Meanwhile others were scuffling with each other to get the perfect shot. I was wondering if they actually saw their child in any of the races.

    In terms of subscriptions to my blog, I have a few opt in forms but I don’t push them as much as I used to. Before I used Postmatic I had a free report to give people and that led to more subscriptions. But they weren’t really engaged with me and I was rubbish at email marketing!

    I’m much happier with engagement now. I know the common thought is that the money’s in the list. The trouble is I don’t want to sell something in every email. Many of the internet marketers I follow provide little value, just endless marketing. I don’t have that in me. It’s almost like begging.

    When it comes to careers, I don’t think I’ll push my kids in any particular direction. If they ask me about it, I’ll give them advice and share my experience but I want them to be able to decide for themselves.

    1. TheJackB – Someone complained that this page doesn’t tell you what to expect to find here in this blog so I aim to rectify this with the next line. I am a father who writes about life, parenting, business, politics and fiction. I don’t use an editorial calendar because I don’t map out what I am going to write that far in advance. The primary focus will be on things that relate to children and parenting. But the nifty thing about that is that encompasses a wide range of things. Sometimes I work with companies on their PR/Marketing efforts. If they provide products or services I will disclose it. Here is an incomplete list of companies that I am currently or have recently worked with: Nintendo, Philips Norelco, Subway, Frigidaire and Mattel. Want to know more about me, keep reading. If I wanted to provide a professional description it would looks similar to this: Jack has a Bachelor of Arts degree in journalism from California State University Northridge. He has been writing for print and web publications for more than twenty years, covering a wide range of topics including: business, technology, parenting, politics, education, sports and religion. That is far too serious so I prefer to use something like: The Jack B. is a writer and author of 39 unpublished books and three screenplays. A former athlete and would be superhero he still fights for truth, justice and the American Way. Though he may look like a grown man, don’t fool yourself he is still a boy at heart. When he is not engaged in Walter Mitty like fantasies he is a husband, father and friend and blogs at TheJackB. Hmm…obviously I have since moved from Random Thoughts over to this place, but that is ok. This page is a work in progress which is a good description for me. I’ll probably tweak this on a regular basis so feel free to keep checking back in because you never know what might show up. I am a prolific writer and update frequently so don’t forget to scroll down the page to see what nugget of wisdom you just might have missed. Here is a short selection of posts to get you started. A Father Describes Parenting A Father’s Burden How Sister’s Helped to Train A Father of “Daddy’s Girl” Inside the Blogger’s Studio- A Dream, Er Nightmare The GermoPhobe What I Dream About I am In Love Becoming a Dad Dad’s Most Important Job A Decade of Dad Grandpa Donuts Why Your Post Sucks and Everyone Hates Your Blog A Letter To My Children- Things That Matter A Letter To My Children-2011 Dad Balances Fear Versus Reality Q&A With Daddy Blogger JackB Save The Last Dance For Me- 75 Years of Marriage An Uncertain Certainty Four Generations & A Wedding The Best Thing My Father Ever Said To Me 1 Foolproof Way To Become a Better Writer The Story Of A House- The Final Days He Died A Hero Twenty-Five Links That Will Make You A Better Writer/Blogger Thanks for coming by, I hope you like it. If you want to reach me use the contact form or try talk-to-jacknow-at-gmail-dotcom You can also find more information by clicking About Me and reading my profile there. Also, I encourage you to sign up for my newsletter using the form on the top right hand side of the page.
      Joshua says:

      Hi Tim,

      I don’t think many people take the time to think about how they are or aren’t seeing things because they are too busy flinging the phone in front of their eyes.

      I definitely don’t spend as much time taking photos of the kids as I used to.

      Not sure why, but I have noticed it.

      Definitely want my kids to be able to say they made their own choices, it is my preference too.

  2. lori – Canada – I love figuring it all out and finding I was wrong, changing my mind, learning that I can get excited again about something I thought I was moving away from; changing life-long habits. Mostly I love my husband and my children; watching us all grow through the changes of life, family reunions and celebrations with a good bottle of port and a shrimp ring.
    Lori Gosselin says:

    Hi Josh, Hi Julie,
    I will take Q3 as well. My advice always runs with doing something that fits with the lifestyle you want to have. I remember a friend I met when I had just had my second child. She had just had her second child too. Nature kicks in big time then, it seems, and mom doesn’t really feel very much career-inclined. This was how I felt. And this was how my friend felt too. Not a problem for me – I worked at home so I could make a bit of an adjustment. Not so with her: She was a doctor. I had to wonder if she realized her decision to go into medical school would lead to a career that would keep her out of the home with no way to adjust that. Since then I’ve always advised anyone who wanted to listen to think about the lifestyle.
    Lori

    1. TheJackB – Someone complained that this page doesn’t tell you what to expect to find here in this blog so I aim to rectify this with the next line. I am a father who writes about life, parenting, business, politics and fiction. I don’t use an editorial calendar because I don’t map out what I am going to write that far in advance. The primary focus will be on things that relate to children and parenting. But the nifty thing about that is that encompasses a wide range of things. Sometimes I work with companies on their PR/Marketing efforts. If they provide products or services I will disclose it. Here is an incomplete list of companies that I am currently or have recently worked with: Nintendo, Philips Norelco, Subway, Frigidaire and Mattel. Want to know more about me, keep reading. If I wanted to provide a professional description it would looks similar to this: Jack has a Bachelor of Arts degree in journalism from California State University Northridge. He has been writing for print and web publications for more than twenty years, covering a wide range of topics including: business, technology, parenting, politics, education, sports and religion. That is far too serious so I prefer to use something like: The Jack B. is a writer and author of 39 unpublished books and three screenplays. A former athlete and would be superhero he still fights for truth, justice and the American Way. Though he may look like a grown man, don’t fool yourself he is still a boy at heart. When he is not engaged in Walter Mitty like fantasies he is a husband, father and friend and blogs at TheJackB. Hmm…obviously I have since moved from Random Thoughts over to this place, but that is ok. This page is a work in progress which is a good description for me. I’ll probably tweak this on a regular basis so feel free to keep checking back in because you never know what might show up. I am a prolific writer and update frequently so don’t forget to scroll down the page to see what nugget of wisdom you just might have missed. Here is a short selection of posts to get you started. A Father Describes Parenting A Father’s Burden How Sister’s Helped to Train A Father of “Daddy’s Girl” Inside the Blogger’s Studio- A Dream, Er Nightmare The GermoPhobe What I Dream About I am In Love Becoming a Dad Dad’s Most Important Job A Decade of Dad Grandpa Donuts Why Your Post Sucks and Everyone Hates Your Blog A Letter To My Children- Things That Matter A Letter To My Children-2011 Dad Balances Fear Versus Reality Q&A With Daddy Blogger JackB Save The Last Dance For Me- 75 Years of Marriage An Uncertain Certainty Four Generations & A Wedding The Best Thing My Father Ever Said To Me 1 Foolproof Way To Become a Better Writer The Story Of A House- The Final Days He Died A Hero Twenty-Five Links That Will Make You A Better Writer/Blogger Thanks for coming by, I hope you like it. If you want to reach me use the contact form or try talk-to-jacknow-at-gmail-dotcom You can also find more information by clicking About Me and reading my profile there. Also, I encourage you to sign up for my newsletter using the form on the top right hand side of the page.
      Joshua says:

      Hi Lori,

      That makes sense to me, to think about the kind of lifestyle you want to live. It certainly helps to figure out the focus so that you can put your efforts into a particular area of interest.

  3. Q3: I believe you can do both. A backup plan with a practical, marketable skill can be worth its weight in gold when you are working on achieving a dream but need good ol cash money to survive. They don’t have to be mutually exclusive.

    1. TheJackB – Someone complained that this page doesn’t tell you what to expect to find here in this blog so I aim to rectify this with the next line. I am a father who writes about life, parenting, business, politics and fiction. I don’t use an editorial calendar because I don’t map out what I am going to write that far in advance. The primary focus will be on things that relate to children and parenting. But the nifty thing about that is that encompasses a wide range of things. Sometimes I work with companies on their PR/Marketing efforts. If they provide products or services I will disclose it. Here is an incomplete list of companies that I am currently or have recently worked with: Nintendo, Philips Norelco, Subway, Frigidaire and Mattel. Want to know more about me, keep reading. If I wanted to provide a professional description it would looks similar to this: Jack has a Bachelor of Arts degree in journalism from California State University Northridge. He has been writing for print and web publications for more than twenty years, covering a wide range of topics including: business, technology, parenting, politics, education, sports and religion. That is far too serious so I prefer to use something like: The Jack B. is a writer and author of 39 unpublished books and three screenplays. A former athlete and would be superhero he still fights for truth, justice and the American Way. Though he may look like a grown man, don’t fool yourself he is still a boy at heart. When he is not engaged in Walter Mitty like fantasies he is a husband, father and friend and blogs at TheJackB. Hmm…obviously I have since moved from Random Thoughts over to this place, but that is ok. This page is a work in progress which is a good description for me. I’ll probably tweak this on a regular basis so feel free to keep checking back in because you never know what might show up. I am a prolific writer and update frequently so don’t forget to scroll down the page to see what nugget of wisdom you just might have missed. Here is a short selection of posts to get you started. A Father Describes Parenting A Father’s Burden How Sister’s Helped to Train A Father of “Daddy’s Girl” Inside the Blogger’s Studio- A Dream, Er Nightmare The GermoPhobe What I Dream About I am In Love Becoming a Dad Dad’s Most Important Job A Decade of Dad Grandpa Donuts Why Your Post Sucks and Everyone Hates Your Blog A Letter To My Children- Things That Matter A Letter To My Children-2011 Dad Balances Fear Versus Reality Q&A With Daddy Blogger JackB Save The Last Dance For Me- 75 Years of Marriage An Uncertain Certainty Four Generations & A Wedding The Best Thing My Father Ever Said To Me 1 Foolproof Way To Become a Better Writer The Story Of A House- The Final Days He Died A Hero Twenty-Five Links That Will Make You A Better Writer/Blogger Thanks for coming by, I hope you like it. If you want to reach me use the contact form or try talk-to-jacknow-at-gmail-dotcom You can also find more information by clicking About Me and reading my profile there. Also, I encourage you to sign up for my newsletter using the form on the top right hand side of the page.
      Joshua says:

      There is something to be said for working out a way to do both. It certainly helps to mitigate the feelings of regret that come if you don’t take a swing at it.

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