How To Stop Bullying- Give Your Child Pepper Spray
The guys in legal have instructed me to tell you that my headline is not to be taken seriously or literally. Nor should you believe me when I claim to have slept with more women than Wilt Chamberlain (sorry mom) or that I once beat Michael Jordan in a game of Horse.
Actually I did beat a kid by that name in junior high, sadly he wasn’t the Michael Jordan you are thinking of.
This post is going to be short, but I don’t if I would call it sweet.
Bullying is an age old problem and it is something that merits legitimate concern. However there is an ongoing problem with people misusing the word. I don’t know if it is because they misunderstand what it means or if they are trying to leverage the “hype” surrounding it, but it is happening.
For example you cannot say that you are being bullied because you don’t like what is on television, in the movies or being said. Unless someone is preventing you from turning off the television, changing the channel or forcing you to listen and you fear the consequences of what would happen if you try to stop, you cannot say you are being bullied.
I am not going to spend the next 10,000 words explaining all of the possible definitions or trying to parse words here either. This post isn’t about building consensus on a uniform definition either.
It is a quick comment written after midnight about my concern that some people are misusing the word and we are going to create a “boy/girl” who cried wolf” issue with this term.
It is similar to my feelings on the misuse of “epic.” Don’t get me started on that one or I might turn into a bully and beat you senseless with the mythical can of Pepper Spray from above.
Every now and then my Facebook stream and inbox become polluted with misinformation that intelligent people with good intentions have forwarded and or posted. That is because some people have a nasty habit of believing anything and everything they read online.
Bill Gates isn’t going to give you a million dollars just because you ask. Steve Jobs didn’t leave money in his will to give all of the children a free Ipad and that pill isn’t going to suddenly add inches to any part of your body, especially if you are female.
And let’s not get started on the political rhetoric that is being passed along because some of you who are forwarding it either failed history/civics and or don’t understand/read what you are passing along.
Our media isn’t making life any better either. The rush to be the first to report is creating multiple issues because misinformation is being shared as if it is fact.
There is something to be said for taking a moment to try to verify that what you share is real, accurate and truthful.
The rumor you have heard about dating my daughter is probably true. Any boy who wishes to take her out must defeat me in single combat. The good news is that if you do Bill Gates will give you a free home on Bainbridge Island and Tiger Woods will play golf with you.
On the other hand you will probably not survive the wrath of my son who will avenge his father.
BTW, the boys in legal have told me that I must tell you that my son will not avenge his father. That is probably because they know that I have never been defeated in single combat.
Just remember boys, there is a lot of desert around here.
Good night from Texas, where everything is bigger, including the stories.