The Lady of the castle hideaway and secret garden insists it is not accurate to say I am almost middle aged and given some of the recent events I have begun to wonder about it.
More than a few people have suggested I lack a soft touch and that gentle is a word that doesn’t describe me well though I disagree with some of that.
What I can confirm is that I have jumped off of rooftops, out of trees and slammed into the earth, other bodies and tested gravity in many ways.
During pick up basketball games I have never shied from diving on the floor after loose balls, trying to vault over chairs on the sideline or run through anyone who didn’t recognize I can’t stop on a dime.
It was never about showing off or trying to prove anything but always because I often played with people far more talented and had to work harder to be competitive.
Add all that to the many moments of testing gravity as a kid or even a guy into my late forties and part of my fifties and the body gives back.
A few dislocated fingers, multiple bruises, strains and scars made for good stories but now the bill has come due in other ways.
But I never just give up or give in because I don’t know how.
The Stories We Share…With Some
I had no intention of going anywhere or buying anything on Black Friday. Though there is a list of things I want the list of things I need is relatively short.
Thought about it as I plugged away fixing code in a few places and mapping out the stories for private blogs where not so secret thoughts are shared.
Looked at the date today and thought about how there are roughly 34 days left before some decisions will be made.
But before I got to all that I found myself reading about percussive massagers and questions about whether ownership of one might help fight Father Time.
A Black Friday ad that showed a significant price reduction on one got me thinking about whether it would serve me as promised.
Did some quick reading and ran to one of the box stores where I discovered a guy who claimed to be a personal trainer and listened to him compare and contrast two models.
Described what I do and what I hoped to achieve and he assured me one model would serve me well and damn if it hasn’t done it.
Two days of use and I have regained more mobility and relieved some ongoing issues. Color me intrigued and less skeptical.
I am very curious to see if continued use provides more relief and enables a better workout.
Optimistic is the word of the moment and grateful that I am able to do things financially and physically that had been challenging.
Seeds planted long ago show growth and that is invaluable.
****
A scammer posed as one of my cousins on Facebook and tried to sell me on the benefits of reaching out to an attorney who would love to give me money to from some sort of Christmas fund.
When they reached out to me I knew that something was off but took a few minutes to play.
The scammer pretended to know me so I made up a bunch of crap to see how they would respond. I’ll share some of it below.
I am not a sheriff and haven’t been one but I figured I’d see what sort of response they came up with.
When they started a conversation I figured, ‘what the hell,’ I’ll run with it. I had Spies Like Us had just started playing on the TV and I remembered the one of the screenwriters is Babaloo Mandel, so I threw his name into the mix.
Some more explanations of the references. The Brooklyn Dodgers played baseball at Ebbets Field and the line about the cliff and the Spaniard is a Princess Bride reference.
I threw in some more Princess Bride and a Lord Of The Rings reference just to see what I would get. Turns out the scammer was interested in what I wanted to do with Uncle Bilbo’s property.
They didn’t flinch when I threw in the bit about Gandalf. Our dialogue continued and they confirmed they still work for Goniffs inc.
In Yiddish a gonif is a thief.
Anyhoo, not long after they entered their pitch for getting money from the Christmas fund and I asked if you needed a certificate of stupidity to partake but again they didn’t flinch.
I am pretty sure English isn’t their first language so to an extent I had no reason to expect them to follow much of what I said but I don’t feel badly about it. I am not the person trying to rob others.
And yes, this is not my first time playing with these people. Some of you know the Bishop of Bullfrog story among others.
I confess I got irritated with this exchange and am not entirely sure why. As we went back and forth I asked the scammer if they had spoken to my aunt and uncle (both died decades ago) and then followed up with a question about if they had spoken with my dad.
The line about nunsense was a reference to my old man who never pronounced the word as nonsense but I can’t tell you why.
Hell, my grandfather pronounced Cincinatti as Sinsehnatteh but I can’t tell you why either. Not sure how that connects to my father saying nunsense but they were both Wilner men so go figure.
You’ll have to ask my kids if I have any particular or peculiar pronunciations. I’ll share now that during this past week I was asked if I am from Chicago, New York and Texas.
Made me laugh, I was born and raised in Los Angeles. Put in more than 40 years of life there so I don’t know where people get these ideas about me having an accent.
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