Hanging out with my pal Hans thinking about how whatever tried to kill me today failed.
Was a rough couple of hours and there was more than one moment when I wondered about things.
It made me very angry and that is usually enough for me to decide I will not give in or lose to whatever is testing me.
Seems to have worked more or less, probably would have served as inspiration for some kind of inclusion here.
Had an abbreviated conversation about houses back home and the various styles there.
Explained that you can’t get a real sense of what is around without a proper tour guide and I am that guy.
Some might say such a thing can only happen when the moon is in the Seventh House and Jupiter aligns with Mars but not me.
Because I have seen and lived things that make it impossible to deny that truth is stranger than fiction.
I could give it you in that old Johnny and June storytelling format or simply wait to see what comes.
Given that I am living a life full off what I never expected or anticipated being/doing there is ample reason to not paint myself into corners in some areas.
More importantly I don’t need people to agree about every little thing, some aren’t big enough to be deal breakers.
A relative asked if I have any idea where retirement will take me and I said I really don’t.
Maybe I’ll buy a place in Israel and live there six months of the year or maybe I’ll end up in some beach town like Santa Barbara or San Diego.
Maybe I’ll end up somewhere in the Midwest or the East Coast, hard to say.
Unless I win the lottery or get a bigger raise soon there is a significant chunk of years left before I get to hang up with my cleats.
None of that takes into account where my kids might set up shop and whether I’ll have grandchildren.
Not ready nor interested in being grandpa today, but down the road is ok with me.
So there are more than a few variables at play here that could impact decisions and I am ok with that.
Don’t want to be like John at the bar and look at life and talk about how it is killing me so some things are in motion.
Always feel better when I take the tiller and try to steer my ship and I understand my control of it all is limited.
Can’t make people do what I want just by virtue of asking them to but have had some success.
There is truth in saying you miss every shot you don’t take.
Mr. Wilner the younger just grabbed a seat at the table. We’re both working on our computers and both wearing noise cancelling headphones.
He is concerned about my thoughts, wants to know why I am staring at him. Could tell him I am thinking about 9/11 and how he played with blocks while I watched the towers fall.
Would tell him that he played with blocks all the time and that I don’t think he was doing it because of the television, especially since he ignored it much of the time.
Could tell him that it is sometimes hard to reconcile how fast he and his sister grew. People told me it would happen and I didn’t not believe them, but I still didn’t expect it to be this fast.
Surreal to be doing career planning to try and ease my way out while he is just starting to dig into his, but that is how it goes.
I think I put in about 15 years or so of work before my folks retired so in theory one piece of history could repeat itself…maybe.
Not really a big deal or important, but kind of interesting to me.
