Not sure if there is a reason to write a I Wrote You A Damn Letter III cuz it was never meant to be a sequel or trilogy and those who know it means to go read don’t need a push and this isn’t that.
It is just a response to intuition, a feeling that refuses to be ignored and demands my attention.
Could ignore it but experience has taught me it will come back and kick me in a place less comfortable so I might as well avoid extra pain and stress.
Spent two hours on with tech support and lost half a day of work to a tech issue I couldn’t solve on my own. Pissed me off more than just a little bit because it was a repeat of something from earlier this summer.
Set me off because I know with a little time I could learn enough to fix the damn thing myself and that would make me happy because I hate relying upon others to do much of anything I can do.
Hate being irked about something I put time in and don’t feel good about because it doesn’t meet my standard for competence, let alone excellence.
Feeling a bit like an old pirate sailing through a storm, destination uncertain but perhaps known.
Heading through the storm, fighting off the sea monsters and the siren song while peering through the mist towards a north star I can’t see but know is there.
Close my eyes and listen to the sounds of the sea while watching dolphins swim with the ship and know I only feel like Odysseus but am not him.
Feel like pouring a shot or six and daring age to prove I am not as young as I feel but won’t because I have to get back on the treadmill…tonight.
Hard not to hear the call of the ocean, can’t remember going this long without a visit of some sort in decades.
Sometimes I am extra conscious of being landlocked and it grinds upon me a bit. There is a difference in knowing you can be on the sand or in the sea within a short drive and knowing a plane is required.
It is a funny thing, this feeling of angst in conjunction with the confidence it is a passing thing because you have reached that palace where you are more in control of the hard stuff than ever before.
Call it life experience telling you to chill out because you are good now while your head says things can flip only for your heart to slap some sense into you.
“We have got this.”
You hear it and then you nod your head because you know you do. What you have been reaching for is coming.
