“I’ll get you back. I’ll find you. I’ll have you again.”
The echoes of promises made long ago are still heard inside my head and they bring an assortment of memories along with them.
Conversations almost forgotten but for digital records bring them back and I wonder what power if any lies in what was once said.
I know where it comes from and what prompted this particular journey and can see with perfect clarity how the death of a fraternity brother roiled still waters.
It is how it works with me and to a certain extent my not quite mini-me.
Fact is it was the conversation with him in which I heard those words slip past my lips and felt the stirring of long ago.
“I’ll get you back.”
Will You Listen To My Story?
If you took the time to watch the trailer or if you are familiar with the show you know Coach Tailor’s line about us all being tested.
I know what it means because I am in the midst of that test…again.
It is not the first and I suspect it won’t be the last time but it is happening.
The best part about it not being the first is I know a little bit about what lies beneath the surface and that once I had enough in the tank to go the distance.
If you watch that trailer and hear the line Texas forever you’ll hear something that hit me long ago but you probably won’t hear the bells that went off and feel the click I felt.
Will you listen to my story isn’t really a question because you either will or you won’t.
And if you will it is because there is something more driving it, something that can’t be explained because it can only be understood by those who have felt it.
You either get it or you don’t and even if you get it you might not choose to be open to hearing it.
Sometimes lightning strikes and sometimes it misses and we haven’t any control about the when and where.
The best we can do is be prepared to respond if and when it hits.
Is He Building Or Melting Something Down
He almost looks me in the eye now and if he keeps growing like this it won’t be much longer before I am looking up at him.
The question is will it be a slight tilt or a bigger one.
We talk about it briefly and it leads to a short interlude about confidence.
“Sometimes confidence is everything. If you have it taller women won’t think twice about dating you.”
He rolls his eyes at me and says he is not interested in hearing my dating advice. I tell him I am not giving dating advice and say a few more things that he takes as dating advice.
That aggravates him slightly because he feels like I am not listening but the thing is I know what I want to get through to him and I don’t think he’ll hear it if I take a direct approach.
So I couch in a conversation about girls and hope that even though he doesn’t want to hear it some of what I say will sink in.
“One day talk to your girl about whether the blacksmith is building or melting something.
Engage her in a conversation about how sometimes you build something bigger and better by tearing down the structure and building a better foundation.
Or ask her to talk about how to take something that is already standing and reinforce it. If she likes spending time with you she will run with it.”
He shakes his head.
“Learn how to make her laugh and make sure you listen.”
“Dad!”
I smile and we change the topic.
The time for testing is here and though I have always been a decent test taker I worry about whether I am failing.
The Misty Mountains
Inside my head I have answered the call of the Misty Mountains and am wandering through the range.
Ten years after I was asked to come I am here and nothing is as anticipated but that is to be expected.
Nothing stays the same and the rocks within the stream of life are forever polished and shaped by the water that passes.
I am gearing up for tomorrow and preparing myself for what is to come.
My only friends are pirates
That’s just who I amBetter As A Memory– Kenny Chesney
Life is backwards because the things that get easier with experience sometimes require more physical stamina.
When you are best suited to deal with them physically you aren’t always mentally tough enough and when you are mentally tough enough your physical skills aren’t quite where you want them to be.
But they say age is a state of mind and suggest if you have the will you can find the way.
So now I’ll sign off and think about where to find the way and if not the way, then a way and time will tell if that is enough.
I said I would get you back, now we find out what that means.
