People say that Father’s Day is this coming Sunday but it won’t be for me.
Or maybe it is more accurate that it will be a different sort of Father’s Day, ya know the kind where you don’t spend any time with your kids.
It is not because of anything they did, but because of me.
Because I moved far away and they haven’t come…yet.
They will, but it will be after Father’s Day and so Sunday I’ll be on my own, most likely unpacking boxes and trying to get settled in the new house.
The house they haven’t seen yet, but the one we’ll all live in.
And though it was my choice to move and done for the best of reasons those rascals are responsible for the move.
Don’t tell them that now because they aren’t ready to hear it, but one day they’ll appreciate my having learned about life because of them.
Gratitude & Attitude
I ended up 1,500 miles from home because the kids helped me learn the importance and value of experiences.
It wasn’t an easy move or something I did frivolously but something I did because I believed it was the best way to help provide them with experiences.
The best way I could help them see more and do more while getting a good education and living in a nice place.
They helped me learn how much fun it is to give and the importance of gratitude and a good attitude.
I know it sounds hokey, but it is true.
I know parents who think differently. Parents who would never subjugate their own happiness for their kids because they figure one day the kids will have jobs and be able to pay for their own stuff.
People who say they’ll give them something now, but that the focus is on mom and dad because they want to do things while they are young.
Well, I can’t understand that point-of-view or understand how these people don’t understand how much fun it is to have experiences with the kids.
And because of my belief in experiences I had to think really hard about what I need and what I want.
Time To Change
The kids don’t appreciate Time To Change the way my generation does and that is cool with me. I get it, people and things change.
The things that are turn to were and you either move along with it or get left behind.
If you look hard at the picture above you can almost see the face of the preteen sitting on my lap. Sometimes I look at the face and wonder what happened to the little girl from the first picture.
That one would curl up in my lap, lay her head on my belly or climb towards my shoulder and go to sleep.
The new girl is quick to ask me for help and or text me a quick a good night and just as quick to let me know that she doesn’t appreciate certain comments on Instagram.
Once I was a king who could do no wrong and now I am just the clown prince.
Thing is, I am good with it.
If the kids couldn’t function without my guidance, if they couldn’t figure out what to do without my influence I would be really concerned.
Sometimes they do something ridiculous or silly and I ask them to explain themselves but I also am grateful for those moments.
Not just because they are teaching moments but because they are proof that something about parenting has gone the right way.
Independence and confidence are of paramount importance.
Still I would be lying if I said that sometimes I miss the days when they were really little and needed me more.
Do What We Must
Sometimes when friends without kids ask about parenting I tell them the two great lessons have been to do what we must and the meaning of true fear.
I don’t know if it is possible to understand the depth of those two things without kids and I’ll never have to worry or wonder about that.
All I have to do is keep being dad and do my best to keep providing those experiences for them. Sometimes that might require doing what we must and being apart for holidays.
But I have no regrets because I did it for them and that is enough of a reason for me.
Look at the little boy holding that baby, whoa, he had hair. 🙂
Disclosure: I have partnered with Life of Dad and Pampers for this promotion.