If I said we started whose end must now wait you might accuse me of plagiarizing a famous song writer or say I am using a tired old cliche to grab the reader’s attention.
No way to sing the song or paint the picture in anything but the most imperfect and inelegant way.
Instead of gliding into the room like Astaire or Baryshnikov I come flying in like Ralph Kramden or if I am more forgiving Ralph, from the Greatest American Hero.
The guy can fly but he is an awkward mess who slams into walls because it is the only way he knows how to land.
Gorillas In The Mist
Is it because Needles and Vegas are more familiar or for some other reason?
Hell if I know.
Can’t count the number of times English teachers or others have tried to tell me about the secret meaning authors put in their writing and how many times it made me shake my head.
Sometimes we try to be clever and provide a special reader with a message only they’ll understand but rarely do we try to come up with something that is so clever the average reader won’t catch it.
It is much easier to be direct and to spell out what you mean to say and say what you mean or so it seems.
Except in the real world it often feels like we are gorillas in the mist talking to each other by breaking branches, shaking bushes and gesturing at others from a distance.
We hope that our message will be understood and not misinterpreted or twisted but who knows if it it really is or will be.
Who knows if those you could spend a week in a closet with ever hear or see you or if you ever hear/see them.
Sometimes we roll from heartbreak to heartbreak never knowing if the ache that follows break will be granted dispensation to heal.
To go away for long enough to turn into a memory worth looking at and not a scar you think of as an ugly reminder.
Maybe it would be better to really be a gorilla because gorillas don’t let themselves get lost in the minutiae of life.
They just live hard and keep going.
I don’t know where that Bukowski line comes from but I quickly fell in love with it.
It reads to me as a reminder of my favorite mistakes and how they don’t all have to have a negative connotation tied to them.
Sometimes they are the best or close to the very best things that can happen to you.
Prejudice Versus Pride
When you are of a certain are your pride pushes you to focus on being with those you think of as being good enough for you.
It is only when you are older that your prejudice overtakes your pride and instructs you to find and keep those who do the best job of filling the empty spots you can’t fill yourself.
If you are lucky you gain enough experience early in life to recognize you’ll forever search for the perfect match unless you learn to accept that perfect doesn’t exist.
You might find he or she at a time that is inconvenient. The circumstances might not be ideal and present an easy way to proceed.
Some will tell you the best love isn’t convenient or easy for the same reason as the man/woman of faith says there is a higher power.
It is comforting to do so.
Humans like to believe there are reasons and structures that we can rely upon to explain the how and why of life.
Not me, I say put your hand in mine and if you feel an electric charge and or get butterflies just accept it because the real magic isn’t defined by science or by faith alone.
It is an amalgamation of all that you know and don’t know.
Hopes and dreams plus a dash of fear and uncertainty.
Sometimes it is the best thing you have done and sometimes the scariest.
It is being back in the city where nothing is clear and going forward because to stay still is to stagnate and to go backwards is impossible.